Charlie and Drew were talking about some of their experiences in the Dominican Republic this year, and invited me out to lunch with them even though I hadn't gone so I could hear about the trip. What's so cool about ONE's ministry is that Drew truly believes that while all of the kids in ONE didn't go on the trip, they need to be involved in the experience because ONE is a family. Now I'm part of that family, if only in a small way, and that's pretty special to me.
Most of the conversation at lunch was just about how they saw some kids change over the trip,and specifically how (praise God!) a student accepted Christ and was baptized on the shores of the Dominican, helped into a better understanding of God by other ONE students.
Upon returning to the office, Charlie spread out on the couch and Drew sat in his office chair while I listened to them talk about what Christians would call "mountaintop experiences."
(as well represented here as I can remember)
*Drew, leaning back in his office chair, hat cocked to the side underneath quickly growing curls, looking 17 but being, as always, truly 34, 3 kids and a wife at home.
*Charlie, 1.5 years of school, one year and 3 days married, Drew's right hand man and co-pastor, lying vertically, hand on his chest.
*Claire, legs crossed, sitting at my desk, observing.
Drew: I mean, it's just hard, you know, because our students start to think they go on these trips and fail in some way if they don't have as good of a time as they did when they went before, or if they didn't feel the love of God in such an intense way...it's hard to know how to navigate that.
Charlie: Yeah, man.
(Thoughtful pause)
I was thinking about something from a book I read awhile ago, the author was talking about how we can't hold on to a past mountaintop because God has new ones to show us. We might miss the ones right in front of our eyes if we're constantly having our heads turned back the other way.
Drew: Yeah, yeah, man, that's deep.
(At this point I'm just sitting there, right brained as I am, seeing what Charlie is saying as a picture, like God just standing in front of me saying, "Claire, look at me. Look at me, love. Don't look back there. Grow from that, look at what's ahead of you. I'm hearing that verse in Isaiah 43.. "Look, I'm doing a new thing! Do you not percieve it?" which was the verse from God's mouth to my ears Freshman year and has kept showing up, like a holy parasite, digging into my heart, since that day).
Drew, continued: That's really good, Chuck. As Christians it's like, what do we do in the inbetween? When we feel like we aren't looking back at a mountain and we're not tripping over our own feet missing something ahead of us? Are there times when truly NOTHING is happening?
Charlie: Maybe that's when we just need to be still, to listen. God is going to show up, because he's there the whole time. All he does is show up. Just sometimes not in the ways we want.
***
After that, we all just sat there for awhile, thinking. A 34 year old father, a 25 year old brand new husband, and a 21 year old me, sitting in the presence of God, just being together. I know this isn't a conversation I was technically involved in, but it was like the Holy Spirit kept me quiet. I wasn't afraid to talk, and I had some ideas, but it was just like I had an awareness I was supposed to be listening instead.
There's so much going on right now in my life, mostly things I'm writing about in the other journal I have (I put my personal ones out of the 4 I'm supposed to do a week in there), that my mind is going all the time. And honestly, it's exhausting. It was nice to just rest there, with these two men who love the Lord. Their passion to understand and discuss Kingdom issues spring from a strong love of Jesus and a passion that these kids in the ministry of ONE might fall more in love with GOD himself, and not just their idea of him.
The more I am around these men, and Chelsea, the clearer I think I'm seeing the face of GOD. These High Schoolers are beyond blessed to have them. I hope they realize it.
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