It was a strange thing to basically be in charge of a whole church service today. I guess a lot of my internship has actually been preparing me to do things like this- help the pastor with service order, run the welcome table and greet any faces that appear to be scared or new, and get ready at any time to jump up and fill in for somebody if something goes haywire- basically know where everyone is, what they need to do, and how they need
Luckily, it went off pretty well. With such a smaller group because half of our church family is in the DR, it was just neat to have a more intimate service. I read from Buechner for communion today, and also did the welcome.
So much is going on in my life right now that this internship has become SO integrated- as I'm praying about things in my life, those things are showing up in my internship, and things Drew will have me looking at in Scripture or to prepare for a sermon will speak to something else I'm learning, and so on. It's something I've experienced at Wheaton more than anywhere else in my life- you know, a professor says something and it just happens to connect perfectly with what you read that morning, and then later that day someone needs that exact advice, and two weeks later you get a letter saying that your facebook note really encouraged them, which was just you writing about that simple thing the professor said that morning.
Kind of reminds me of that weird thing people are always saying about how the brush of a butterfly's wing can somehow, down the line, after a series of other events. start a hurricane.
But nothing is really a small thing, I'm finding out. Even the things that seem small mean something much bigger when put in a different context, or something you think is small will totally open someone else's world up and change the course they were on- hopefully for better, and not worse.
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My heart hurts for some of these kids I see in service sometimes. I can barely explain it. Some of them mill outside, around the gym, clearly dropped off by their parents or their parents are in the adult service- having no idea their kids aren't getting fed the word of God, and are actually texting their friends outside the door.
I want them to know that it's not about the gym, it's not about the cool music (that they think is so uncool), and it's not about the fact that I'm a hip young intern who goes to "some school that's so hard I don't know why anyone would go there." Haha.
I love these kids. I love them but they break my heart. You see the ones inside the service who are stretching their hands out to God, grabbing others to pray, weeping for sin or rejoicing for victory, only a wall width away from the others, as they stand with their backs to the sermon in the lobby, wondering when lunch is.
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I welcomed a girl who looked lost as she came in today, and met her parents. They were visiting from another church because she had heard about the youth program and was interested in checking it out. I told her that's how I first heard about Eastview--through a friend who said it was "you know, just a lot of fun--people who love Jesus hanging out and loving each other." :)
Her parents look relieved that she had found someone to talk to, so as they went to the adult service I grabbed her and brought her inside, introducing her to some solid high school girls that I myself have been getting to know lately. They were so warm and welcomed her in, worshipped with her, sat with her. I caught Mariah as she was leaving and asked her how it went. "I really liked it" she said sweetly. I said we'd love to see her again next week- that it would be a bit of a different feel with everyone from the mission trip back.
No doubt an intimidating day for her- I remember going into a gym full of 300 high schoolers I didn't know, just praying someone would come up to me and relieve me of my awkwardness. It was really special to be able to be that person for her.
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